Winter has arrived, and with Christmas around the corner, a new dating trend called “sledging” is making waves in the chilly season. For those who cherish traditional romance, this trend might not align with fairy tale love stories. Sledging has quickly caught the attention of Gen Z this winter, following the footsteps of past trends like breadcrumbing, ghosting, situationships, love bombing, and zombieing.
What is Sledging?
Sledging is a dating trend where a partner intentionally keeps a relationship going through the winter holiday season, only to break up afterward. It involves dragging someone along during the cold months, avoiding a breakup to escape being single in the chilly season. This trend is particularly common among Gen Z, especially those aged 18 to 25.
The winter season, often referred to as “cuffing season,” is traditionally about finding a partner or relationship to cozy up with during the colder months. However, sledging takes a different approach. Unlike genuine connections, this trend involves Gen Zers prolonging dates with people they’re not truly interested in or postponing breakups to avoid being alone during the festive season.
*Sledging: A Toxic Winter Dating Trend*
Sledging, as highlighted in a ‘Psychology Today’ report, is a manipulative practice where someone pretends to be genuinely interested in their partner but is actually seeking temporary companionship during the chilly holiday season. This toxic trend can leave the other person blindsided and hurt when the relationship abruptly ends after the festivities. Moreover, those who engage in sledging not only risk damaging trust but also waste their partner’s time, preventing them from finding someone who truly values the relationship.
New research reveals that over 15% of single 18-25-year-olds have continued dating the same person through the festive season, despite not being genuinely interested, with plans to end things afterward. Romance expert Claire Rénier from the dating app Happn warned Gen Z about the dangers of this toxic dating trend, calling it a “giant red flag.” He explained that sledging plays with emotions and promotes short-term satisfaction. A survey conducted by Happn, involving over 600 daters, found that 15% of young people string along their seasonal partners for companionship, sex, or to avoid uncomfortable questions about their relationship status from family members. The study also revealed that 75% of sledgers decide to break up in November, while 25% plan to end things as early as August.
“People shouldn’t be treated this way in what should be a loving and trusting relationship,” said Rénier, who suggests victims of sledging dust themselves off and try again. “Young people should find more authentic connections with people with shared locations and hobbies,” she advised. “This way they can find partners that are genuinely interested in them, and sustain a relationship to last beyond just the winter.”
Signs of Sledging
How can you avoid falling victim to sledging? Start by looking for key signs that you might be caught in this toxic trend:
1. Your partner avoids talking about the future: If discussions about your relationship extend beyond upcoming holidays like New Year’s or Valentine’s Day seem to be off-limits, it could be a red flag.
2. Your relationship is primarily physical: If your conversations mainly revolve around physical aspects, such as “Was it good for you too?”, it suggests a lack of deeper connection, which is concerning for any long-term prospects.
The core things aren’t in place like shared values or a shared vision: If you lack any real connection with your partner, it might not be too long before a sledgehammer comes down on your relationship.
Your partner seems disinterested in your life: It’s a bad sign when you tell your partner that you just won a Grammy award and your partner says, “That’s nice,” and turns back to watching Cobra Kai.
Your partner seems annoyed or even disgusted with you: Examples include heavy sighs every time you do something and being highly critical of you.
Your partner has sledged other people in the past: If you think you are so special that you will avoid the same fate that others faced, then good luck with that.
Your partner seems to be setting up future possibilities with other people: It’s a bad sign when your partner asks you to take a photo of him or her for a new Tinder profile.