While the ‘Nagpur Party Animals’ (NPA) have their weddings at Radisson or Aditya Niwas, the ‘really fancy NPA brigade’ have theirs in upscale beach resorts in Goa!
The “World Zoological Society” was very keen to have a detailed and in-depth study of this ‘Migratory Matrimonial Species’ and learn of their behavioural traits, And #BOBE being a skilled researcher in this field was assigned the task.
Being privileged to travel to a few such weddings, Including a recent exotic and fun-filled one, #BOBE managed to stay sober for long enough, despite the overflowing and never-ending stream of alcohol, to make some key observations and analysis.
1 Observed that the female of this species goes into a flap and doesn’t know what clothes to pack or wear to such an event, as the ‘Goa vibe’ dictates a ‘Casual’ look, and the NPA female has no clue of this concept!
So they go into panic mode, looking for summery dresses, flip-flops and beach bags! But then give up, and end up in shimmering formals, just like they would back in Nagpur.
2 Observed that many of the invited use the occasion as an excuse to have an extended holiday, arriving days before the official start or staying back after the official close, to party even more! And indulge in some serious casino-related activities!
3 Observed that every time there is a destination wedding, the crappy Nagpur airport bar suddenly sees a huge spike in their turnover on the day of the wedding party’s departure, and declares a bonus for their staff that financial quarter.
4 Observed that everyone in the wedding party is a connoisseur on the Goa restaurant scene. It’s common to hear conversations like, “Aree, Thalassa toa ab khatam ho gaya” or “You must have the lobsters at Martin’s Corner – to die for!” or even “Take my name if you go to Kiki’s and ask them to serve you the same ‘Fish Quattro Formaggio ‘that they curated specially for me… it’s not on the menu!”
5 Observed that the poor wedding couple, (especially the bride) these days have not only to dress up, endure hours of makeup, and go through a long list of ceremonies, But now are also expected to be the main stars and put up performances at the Sangeet, to the great appreciation of the wedding guests.
6 Observed that the most ‘important activity’ at the wedding for the guests is not the ceremonies, Not the various performances by the DJs and Singers, Not even the food or the bar! It’s the female NPAs taking group pictures of themselves in their outfits to post on Instagram with texts like “with my hottie friends“ or “love you babaaabby!”
7 Observed that although the wedding schedule and functions are planned months in advance with specific and well-thought-out timings for all events…However, all sense of time and punctuality goes haywire immediately on the wedding party landing in Goa, As everyone goes into laid-back, relaxed mode…Lunches start at 3 pm, Cocktails at 11 pm etc Everything is hours behind schedule, Soon, everyone goes by the the formula of adding two hours to the “official time” to get the ‘actual time’ for the functions.
8 Observerd that at breakfast, It’s a matter of prestige who went to their rooms ‘last’ the previous night. The Bronze Medal goes to those who mumble that they went at 3pm, The Silver goes to “We were rocking till 4.30 -5 pm yaar!” and the Gold to “Hum toa directly party kar ke breakfast ke liye aye hai, Now we will go to bed”
9 Observed that the guests imbibe alcohol and eat in quantities that astound! So it’s common to land up at any of the many functions and hear someone say “I’m so stuffed and have drunk so much, Cannot even look at food or another drink now!”, Yet 15 minutes later, the same person is with a large peg of whiskey and a plate of Chole kulcha in hand saying “Try the pork chops, Too good, I had three already!”
But the main and most important observation that this survey threw up, Is the amazing, warm and large-hearted hospitality of the hosts, who put in months of work, great attention to detail, and huge expense, to ensure that their guests get the best of everything, have a great time and are pampered and spoilt rotten!
Such love, generosity and warmth of hospitality are not encountered anywhere else!
In return, the NPA guests are also truly special, they bond as one to make sure the events are super successful! They put their livers at risk to imbibe staggering amounts of booze! They survive on little sleep, the girls dress up beautifully to add glamour to every function, And the NPAsof course know how to dance and party, party, party, to make the occasion unforgettable!
Disclaimer: This study is not any one wedding specific! But I fear that the lovely ‘C.S’, will examine every word and dissect every line of this report!
I sincerely hope she approves, or else friends, “It was so nice knowing you!”
@bits_of_beauty_everywhere
#bits of beauty everywhere (#BOBE)
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